This is a painful reminder of a sign that was near the house I grew up in: 3 miles to Pigsland. I wish it said 300 miles, because I was almost 18 years old when I realized for the first time that the air we breathe, the clothes we wear, and the food we eat doesn’t have to smell like pig excrement.

If you’re attaching jets of water to your body you might as well pretend to be Iron Man.

The next phase of robot domination has begun. Try playing in veteran mode, but don’t cry for your mom when you can’t win – the robots probably killed her already.

I wonder if it’s having fun, or if it’s just repeatedly disappointed.

Hmmmm… words and physics… does that have something to do with that edumacation thing people are always talking about?

Maybe this is just how hippos poop.

My personal sugar, sugar Christmas special is usually followed by hyperactivity Christmas special, then drowsiness Christmas special and finally diarrhea Christmas special. Sometimes it extends to self-hatred Boxing Day special.

It’s no a-capella Pokemon theme, but it’s still pretty Nintendawesome.

To get you into the holiday mood, a game about an alien worm decapitating, dismembering, and ingesting various life forms. It’s a Festivus for the rest of us!

Before he was famous on the Internet, Eduard Khil sang the theme for the Green Hill Zone in Sonic the Hedgehog.

I still feel bad for Shirley. She’s only good for pushing things and always ends up standing in the background while the other sheep admire their perky little sheep butts in the mirror. I hope she doesn’t feel… ronery.

If I was a scientist I would shrink myself down and visit the red-light district.

Well this is fun, but if I was really building my own hotel I would include an incinerator for washing the bed sheets. Also useful for dead hooker infestations.

It’s a giant ad for Nokia and Microsoft, but it’s still awesome.