As punishment for not asking me who Mallory is (he’s my imaginary son), I’ve decided to punish you all by force feeding you nothing but cheese and potatoes for three decades.

Want to know how to hack? This game will provide you with step by step instructions to turn you into an elite hacker, capable of performing major hacking feats like burning through the NCIS public firewall.

I’ve cancelled the family’s trip to the shore and have instead planned a new one to the Home Depot parking lot. Mallory is going to be thrilled!

For fans of Flash games, this is a work of art. For fans of Rock Band, this might be a bit like an Xbox 360 package with a sweater inside.

They should call these Orange Diaper Mold Pants.

I used to have a snow tail but it fell off during my personal evolution. Apparently now I have to learn how to ski all over again.

Just take some already insane biking and then add some snow and internal combustion.

I too have a mission in space today. That is of course assuming you can consider the area under my kitchen table as a “space”, and also assuming that quietly weeping counts as a “mission”.

Someone call the fire department.

I knew this game was going to make me laugh as soon as it allowed me to spit on tiny flying cube babies while it was loading. It’s probably one of the most common indicators of a humorous game.

It’s time for another washing machine snuff film!

Big half-naked men with shaved chests and a pet furry. Nope, not gay at all.

Fluent backwards talking is apparently a skill possessed by some people… Some evil, clearly possessed people.

And for the third time
the blue elephant
unlocks the doors of destiny
and greets the winter of his existence