When Dimitri the Lover left Olga two messages on her answering machine, she clearly didn’t know what she was missing by not calling him back.

I know I said I was done with tower defense games, but I swear this isn’t one. I have play tested it thoroughly, and I can guarantee that there is not a single tower in the game, nor do you do any sort of defending. It’s actually more of a OH THE WEB OF LIES PLEASE FOGIVE ME

For those of you playing along at home, you’ll want to remember not to slow down and stop as you travel over the railroad crossing.

hhheeeeeeeeeee’ssssss baaaaaaack…

I’ll bet you didn’t know that this is where cats come from.

Yeah, I know it’s old, buy hey - so is your mom!

Frank Sinatra, eat your heart out.

Missile Command + magnetic fields + eye of newt + 2 tbsp salt = M.I.R.C!

Why is it that the dominant instinct people have when they get on a motorcycle for the first time, is to gun the throttle and run into something?

No matter how cute you try and draw a cartoon hedgehog, it will never, ever, ever ever ever, look as cute as a real life hedgehog. I think it’s one of the laws of physics.

crazy japan man
cool yourself, jump in the ice
shiny red panties

He’s Gon Getchoo!

Now personally I would just drive around the entire mess to get to the flag, but if renegade shopping carts, giant palmetto olives, and gaping cavities in the earth are your cup of tea, then by all means - whatever floats your boat.

Or at least a cat that looks dead.

I’ve been trying to tell you kids for years now that cursors are pretty much useless. Back in the days of THE DOS OPERATING SYSTEM, we didn’t need cursors. When we wanted to open up the internet we would just… uh… hmmm… what the hell did we do?

If you’ve got a thirst for thrill rides even more dangerous than those manned by travelling carnies, head on down to Indiana and give Joph Ivers’ backyard coaster a try.

Good news OCDers, today we’ve launched a new feature that lets you earn shiny achievements for your profile by playing Dig Your Own Grave games. So get to it! Anyone who doesn’t have them all by the end of the week is, as the French would say, une odeur de cochon avec de petites testicules.

Little did the resident’s of Boise, Idaho know, but the State government had secretly started dumping nuclear waste beneath the town.

In today’s adventure you’re a lowly fly, flying your way through a big bad machine. And if you see any dog poop on the way - what the heck, take a few bites. Let’s see what all that fuss is about.

The latest trend in roller coaster design is 90 degree vertical drops, and the new Fahrenheit coaster in Hershey Park, Pennsylvania, is no exception with a staggering 97 degree fall. That’s right, a drop greater than vertical. Bring another pair of pants.