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JurassicUtility's Favorite Posts:
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If, like me, you were having trouble deciding whether your next videogame purchase should be Kingdom Hearts II or Resident Evil 4, this little video narrated by mc chris should clear up the decision for you.
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Admittedly, this game isn’t my #1 paddle related pastime, however it is a close second.
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Whenever the number on a disc matches the size of the row or column that disc is in, it will disappear. See if you can clear the board, or try to survive as long as possible before filling the grid. Failing that, suicide is your only remaining option.
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I’ve posted a link to this guy’s work before, but here is a gallery with lots more pictures and some extra information.
Julian Beever creates ‘anamorphic illusions’, drawn in a special distortion to create the impression of 3 dimensions when seen from one particular viewpoint.
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I have never played World of Warcraft, nor have I ever seen it outside of a video, but I still enjoyed this. The battle cry of the eager young paladin shall never leave me.
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Something about this picture triggers my gag reflex. Maybe it’s the nostrils. Or the fuzzy glasses. Maybe it’s that all-too-silky goatee hair. Or maybe it’s the jealousy. Best. Haircut. 3VAR!
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If right now you have the option of trying this game or instead heading to the bathroom and smoking a giant brick of crack cocaine, I would highly recommend that sweet, sweet crack cocaine. It’s scientifically proven to be less addictive, and who needs teeth anyways?
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You may have recently heard about how the residents of Boston turned retarded. It seems they could not tell the difference between a Lite-Brite of the Mooninite Ignignokt from Aqua Teen Hunger Force, and an explosive device. The two men hired to put up the ads have been charged with placing “hoax devices”, and in this press conference they treat the situation with the respect it deserves.
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Wherever terrorists lurk, Jack Bauer will smoke them out of their holes. He will bring them to justice, Bauer-style. He will demand they lower their weapons, torture them, and then call Chloe on his cell phone. And don’t think that he goes easy on suspects just because they’re family members or famous fast food detectives; no, no. Because Jack Bauer never retreats, he just attacks in the opposite direction.
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You fruitcakes asked for it, and now you’ve got it: Nanaca†Crash!!. So pause that episode of The Mighty Morphin Power Rangers and put down your Jigglypuff doll. It’s time to save the world, crazy-ass Japanese style!
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Don’t get me wrong, I love the Zen-ness of this game as it is, but throw in some swimming zombies and strap an assault weapon to the dolphin’s head and I think we would have Game of the Year.
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This fight scene has everything from oily men to cheesy gore. It also has something I don’t even know how to describe… grunting? Lots of grunting. Non-stop grunting.
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It’s not that I think a vast majority of you guys are one drink away from a lifetime in the clink and I want to help you avoid it. (I don’t.) It’s more that every time I watch The First 48, someone ends up incriminating themselves. So read, learn and stay out of jail. And remember, the best thing to do to avoid a police interrogation is to ask for a lawyer… or you know, not kill people and eat their organs.
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This game is, as the French say, ‘wickedly awesome’. The performance can be pretty bad, so before starting I recommend you go into the game’s configuration menu and turn motion blur and FPS Stability to OFF. Then tape a LEAVE ME ALONE note to the back of your head because you’ve got places to be (your computer) and people to see (zombies).
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You young whipper snappers! You’re so spoiled by your fancy videogames these days. A real game doesn’t need more than 20 pixels on screen at any one time. And 4 colors is plenty! Any more than that and the developer is just compensating for an incredibly small penis.
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Here’s another game with hypnotically soothing music. But don’t be fooled! It’s only purpose is to mask the sound of the tendons in your wrist crying out in pain.
Use the ‘SCORE’ value for highscores.
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The New York Times recently did a neat photo essay comparing real-life gamers to their in-game avatars. It’s worth knowing that the next time you’re playing Lineage II and feeling all proud of yourself for chatting up some cute little number in pigtails and a miniskirt, it’s probably just Mr. Bubble-Tea over there.
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The prank phone calls Bart Simpson made to Moe’s Tavern (as well as Moe’s responses), are like classic pieces of literature, and should be studied with equal regard alongside the works of Shakespeare and Dickens. These days, thanks to caller-id, many of you will never get to appreciate the beauty of a true prank call.
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This is one of those games that the more I play, the worse I get. And that makes me want to play it more, which makes me suck at it even harder. It’s a vicious cycle, and it will end with me naked, crying, and possibly in the wrong apartment. 66.13 was my best, but that was many games ago…
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Do you hate one-eyed one-horned monsters? Me too! Let’s smash their heads with a hammer. This game may seem easy at first, but it starts messing with you after a while… trust me. And if the game doesn’t seem easy at first, it’s because you’re playing it with the number keys at the top of the keyboard and not the ones on the number-pad silly!
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Videogame nerds rejoice! A fellow videogame nerd who is far more nerdly than you could ever be, has created a fan video of Halo’s Master Chief fighting Samus Aran from Metroid. And it is nerd-o-riffic. I have no idea how it was done, but my guess is probably with magic or through the power of prayer. Possibly a combination of the two, and almost certainly a computer was involved.
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Every country needs a hero. The British have James Bond. The Americans have Jack Bauer. The Canadians have… I’m not sure, maybe some sort of large robotic beaver. And the Phillippines have Agent 00, also known as ‘Weng Weng’. Don’t laugh! He may only be 2 feet 9 inches tall but he’s got a remote controlled razorblade hat for god’s sake!
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This is a police officer. This is drugs. This is a police officer on drugs.
Any questions?
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There is a stinky grey coconut shaped thing inside your skull. Some people call it a “brain” although you may have heard it referred to as “the enemy of the thing in your pants” or perhaps “your greatest disapointment”. Anyways, you’re going to need it for this one…
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Pop quiz fruitcakes, what do you get when you combine child abuse, pirates, gold, Texans, boat people, and Jesus Christ? I’ll give you a hint: think of the craziest thing you can, super-size it, add a side order of crazy, then wash it down with a biggie-size cup of crazy. Now you’re getting close.
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Watch in amazement as Bollywood Mega Star Chiranjeevi fends off a posse of angry farmers with nothing more than his tractor, some mud, and the most amazing bunny hopping skills around!
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The future of human-computer interaction is here with the speech recognition built in to Windows Vista! Indeed, it is so seamless that you may even start pretending that you are Captain Jean-Luc Pricard talking to the computer of the U.S.S. Enterprise.
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“Who’s Ego Leonard?”, “Is he jaundiced?”, “What’s this all about?”, and “Did someone just steal my shoes?”. Those were just some of the questions being asked when a giant Lego man washed ashore on a beach in Zandvoort, Netherlands.
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The greatest minds in computer science have banded together to create a revolutionary new gaming experience. And if anyone knows anything about it, let me know. In the mean time here’s a game featuring some triangles and circles that makes you hate your hands.
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Armed dolphins, trained by the US military to shoot terrorists and pinpoint spies underwater, may be missing in the Gulf of Mexico. Their coastal compound was breached during the storm, sweeping them out to sea. Experts who have studied the US navy’s cetacean training exercises claim the 36 mammals could be carrying ‘toxic dart’ guns. Divers and surfers risk attack, they claim, from a species considered to be among the planet’s smartest.
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I’ll bet you thought that Superman was a really great guy, what with his saving the Earth from all manner of calamity, but not so I’m afraid. He also has a strong inclination towards homicide, blackmail and just general mean-spiritedness, as evidenced by these comic covers. continue reading… »
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Photographers catch George Bush writing Condi Rice a secret note during the Security Council meeting at the 2005 World Summit. Behind every great man…
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One of the coolest art websites I’ve seen. There’s lots to explore and the art is great… but avoid the photos section (trust me).
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Two brothers in a family of drifters. One lost forever, and one forever searching. Follow Dr. Kagamura as he discovers the truth about his brother, lost in the D-Dimension where everyone drifts all the time, and it’s impossible to drive in a straight line…
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As a world renowned rocket surgeon, I don’t get much downtime, so I really relish the hour a week I spend at the salon getting my locks moisturized. Now with this holophonic recording of a barbershop, I can recreate that relaxing sensation in my rocket laboratory. Make sure you listen to this with headphones, and close your eyes and picture yourself in a barbershop for extra effect!
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I generally make it a point not to argue with giant stone heads that vomit guns out of their mouths, but I think Zardoz may be a little off the mark here.
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If David Bowie writes a song about you, you gotta take what you get. His musical genius speaks only one language, and that is the language of truth.
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Rumor has it the creators of this game are on the run from the law. They’re being brought up against federal charges for having released a sproingy game without the inclusion of springy-sproingy sounds effects. It’s only a short jail term in the US, but they’re actually facing the death penalty in Singapore.
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Unable to literally feed Michael Vick to the dogs, an enterprising eBay user came up with the next best thing.
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Can you solve the mysterious puzzle of Heady Steinberg? There’s a prize if you can! (The prize is hugs and cuddles.)
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This makes me wonder how many penises have been hidden in all the cartoons I’ve watched over the years.
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