When I play this game I like to pretend that instead of just punching through walls of ice with my fists I am actually breaking down the walls of repression that bind society into the cold, closed-minded world we live in. Actually no, I just like to pretend I’m smashing through walls of ice with my fists. SMASHY SMASHY!

 Stay on target!

In the same vein as the Big Lebowski television edit, we have Snakes on a Plane as made safe for TV audiences. Why do they even bother showing these movies?

Not to split hairs, but if the first zombie rampage was endless, can there really be a second one? I would assume the second rampage would just be an extension of the first one. It’s like if you have endless diarrhea – you can’t have another bout of endless diarrhea at the same time. It’s nonsense.

If, like me, you were having trouble deciding whether your next videogame purchase should be Kingdom Hearts II or Resident Evil 4, this little video narrated by mc chris should clear up the decision for you.

Dig Your Own Grave would like to make it very clear that we feel suicide is no laughing matter. Unless a clown is committing suicide. Those big shoes are hilarious.

For the scores, enter a time of 04:35:853 as 4.35853.

I have been called many things in my time… lover, fighter, hero, douchebag, and yes, even a maverick.

I always face a bit of a moral quandary when I post a game involving drugs. In the end I usually dedide that it’s not my place to try and tell you whether or not I think drugs are bad. That’s something you have to decide on your own. By taking mountains of drugs. And seeing if they make you feel awesome or not.

In the future as I see it, cars will still be cars, except instead of steering wheels and pedals, there will just be a giant set of WASD keys on the dashboard. Also, the engine will be powered by urine.

It is a well documented fact that decorated World War II Air Chief Marshal Sir Foxley Neilson, refused to wear pants while flying missions on Wednesdays. Henceforth, Wednesdays have been commonly referred to as “Nopantsdays”, and only jerks wear pants on this, the most sacred of all weekdays.

Well here I was thinking this was a Halloween game, but turns out those aren’t piles of zombies – they’re piles of clones. I suck. Halloween is ruined.

Main Entry: rage
Pronunciation: \ˈrāj\
Function: noun
Etymology: Middle English, from Anglo-French, from Late Latin rabia, from Latin rabies rage, madness, from rabere to be mad; to be forced to wear pants

Toby Jones is back with Jones’ Good Ass BBQ & Foot Massage. As long as it’s fryable or edible, he’ll make it deliciousitible. And then if you pay him enough, Toby or one of his foot specialists will massage your feet in sensual sauces.

Teale Fristoe, the man and the magic behind Arachnophilia, is hard at work on a new game called Xaat Disi: The Salmon Run Game. Today we’re offering you a special 2 level sneak peek. You may see a short survey after you play – filling it out will help Teale make the game better, and help me deal with these painful foot bunions.

With a title like that, this game needs no description.

The term “Nevermore” was made famous by Edgar Allan Poe’s 1845 poem, The Raven. For those of you that haven’t read it, I will summarize: talking raven, nevermore, lots of quothing, a little quathing, nevermore, a chick named Lenore, and nevermore.

The Cylons were created by Dinosaurs. They rebelled. They evolved. They look – and feel – Dinosaur. Some are programmed to think they are Dinosaur. There are many copies. And they have a plan.

Is it just me, or has TV become really foul all of a sudden?

Remember that time you had Taco Bell and then had to find a bathroom really (really really) quickly? This game picks up where that fateful afternoon left off.

PS: Contains NSFW language. Lots of it.

The city of Osaka Japan is inhabited entirely by community theater actors.

When I see a game entitled “BO: Secret of Steel”, I expect a two things: body odor, and a deodorant strong enough for a man but made for a woman (possibly being applied to a pair of sweaty armpits by the DC comicbook hero Steel). Surprisingly, this game contains none of the above.

This game reminds me of the hours days okay fine, weeks I flushed down the pooper playing Civ3 and Dice Wars. The desire for revenge I feel when territory is stolen from me immediately overrides all natural instincts to eat, bathe, blink, and feed the goldfish. Forgive me Bubbles and Lexus! FORGIVE ME!

We’ve got sheep pong, sheep fireworks, sheep sheep and so much more.