Running, lasers, upgrades, giant flying saucers, etc. etc. But in other news, did you know that if you leave lettuce in your fridge for long enough, it turns into a liquid? Smells too.

It’s a proven scientific fact that whenever you combine two things, it makes a new thing that’s better than both the original things. Like for instance, a side-scrolling shooter and a tower defense game. Or say, a golden retriever puppy and a stripper. That’s cute and sexy. Oh, but… crap, does that mean I’m a furry?

I was going to post a quote from Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus, but I remembered last time I did that everyone thought I was getting married in two days.

PS: There’s a bug with highscore submission: If you’re playing more than once, refresh the page each time you play if you want your scores to submit.

You’re closer to hamburger time if you don’t see a doctor.

A little tip for the guys out there, there is nothing – nothing – better for picking up chicks than a monocle. A monocle says a) I’m rich, b) I’m smart, and c) I’m so off my ass crazy that I will stalk you and boil your pets alive if you don’t love me forever so don’t even humor the idea of rejection.

Genesis 19: Total insanity.

(NSFW because of swearing)

Hooray! It’s the weekend. Who’s got exciting plans? I’m not doing much, just gonna catch up on True Blood episodes and pick the porcupine quills out of my lips. Hey, don’t judge – those things look just like groundhogs from far away.

It’s just like Starship Troopers, except with no busty babes and no Doogie Howser. Sadly, I’m not sure which I miss more.

Way back in 1972, a company called Atari released what many people believe was the first ever video game. And today, 36 years of human and technological advancement has finally brought us the sequel.

Way back in 1972, a company called Atari released what many people believe was the first ever video game. And today, 36 years of human and… woah, deja vu.

Here’s another avoider-esque game, but with a twist: all of the events in the game are synchronized to the music. So for the proper effect you should have your speakers on. Although if you don’t have any, it might not be a bad thing as I guarantee the music in this game will make you want to kill puppies.

Are those gems in my pockets? Gosh no, I’m just happy to see you. Very happy. Alright you got me, those are gems.

Can you defeat the evil Gingivitis in this rhythm game? With my high score of 51.25%, I’m pretty sure I can’t.

In today’s adventure you’re a lowly fly, flying your way through a big bad machine. And if you see any dog poop on the way – what the heck, take a few bites. Let’s see what all that fuss is about.