Is there a better way to spend No-Pants-Wednesday than by shooting people from the window of your 300-square-foot studio apartment? Take a break, cataloging your cat skull collection can wait until tomorrow!

A popular corollary to Godwin’s Law states that anyone who uses a Nazi comparison in an internet argument automatically loses said argument. A less popular corollary to Godwin’s Law (created by me) states that anyone who plays a flash game involving Nazis is a douche. So go ahead and click the link McDouche.

This game almost gets it right. No secret levels, no puzzles, no keys to unlock doors, no ‘moving around’. Just shooting lots of things that die really easily and sometimes even explode. Now if we could just incorporate a few topless women into the background or something I think we would have a winner. And maybe Korn in the soundtrack. Is Korn still cool? Okay, Slipknot then.

This game is exciting! I got to stage 9 before I took one to the chest. Don’t expect to get as far as me though unless you have lived a hardened life on the street and dodged bullets in real life. I’ve taken a few to the chest in real life too and lived to tell about it. Calm down ladies, there’s plenty to go around, just send in an application.

It’s Thursday folks! So uncork that bottle of ‘88 Grand Vin de Leoville, strip down to your underwear, and blast waves of stickmen into bloody heaps in my new favorite game, Stickman Madness. It’s madness I tell you.

This is one of those tower-defense-type games, only with this one you get in on the action a little bit. It’s been around for a while, but unlike me not everyone is a walking Flash game encyclopedia, so I thought I’d share. And also unlike me not everyone has the figure and features of a Greek god, but unfortunately there’s nothing I can do about that.

Who would have thought a puzzle without the picture could be so… time consuming. But if you finish past level 10 alien technology from the future will transport you to a land of sweets and joy and joyness. It’s awesome. Trust me.

The Bugheads are back, and they won’t stop until they have eaten your liver with some fava beans and a nice Chianti. To keep your precious organs safe within your body all you need to do is shoot all the Bugheads until your monitor is red with their blood, your eyes have dried open, and your clicking finger is swollen up like a fat Polish sausage.

It was almost a year ago today. I had just downed my last bottle of ‘88 Grand Vin de Leoville. I stripped down to my underwear, openned a family size tub of Skippy, and spent the rest of the evening getting friendly with a sassy little flash game by the name of Stickman Madness. Ahhhhh… the memories.

This is a very cool little puzzle game that I think even the non-gamers will enjoy. All you have to do is get the bloxor into the hole. It’s sort of like golf, only with a big brick instead of a ball, and no clubs, and you don’t hit anything, you just sort of roll around. So like I said, nothing like golf.

Ah, Death by Hinge. Not quite as desirable as Death by Puppies, but still a preferred alternative to Death by Frilled Shark if you ask me.

Halloween is coming, and I for one am so excited that every time I think about it I pee in my pants a little bit. To help set the mood, let’s start the week off with some decapitations!

Look, I don’t want to scare any of you out there, but zombies are coming to eat your brains, and soon. Like tomorrow. Probably around 3pm. We’re planning on grabbing some Taco Bell first, so we may be a little late. Excuse me, they might be a little late. Heh.

This game is pretty gross, but hey, what’s Halloween without a little blood and body parts? Why, it would be like having Christmas without snow! (and blood and body parts.)

Lately we’ve been doing a lot of bubble-popping, candy-coddling, and sushi-rolling, so today we’re going to have you kill unsuspecting innocent people by shooting them in the head. It’s all part of a balanced lifestyle.

Admittedly, this game isn’t my #1 paddle related pastime, however it is a close second.

Remember, these are just stickmen. It’s not considered real violence if your victims are two-dimensional and faceless. And yes, that would also apply to Lindsay Lohan if you happen to run into her.

Storm the House 3… errr.. *cough* excuse me, Stickman Madness 3 is finally out!

There is really no reason to fear us zombies. We’re just like you. We like sleeping in late. We read the paper in the morning over a danish and a cup of dark roast. Okay, it’s a brain danish. And a cup of dark brains. And it’s not so much “sleeping” as it is hunting human flesh. But it’s all good, we’re cool homie. What’d you say your address was?

Ha! Balloon armies! Have you ever heard of anything so silly? What next, clown armies? Wait, clown armies would be terrifying.

Boom Chicka Boom. Chicka Chicka Boom Boom.