Well, maybe I’m not. But quadruple the speed of this thing, shrink it down, and attach some kind of gunpowder propelled hook to it, and I will be!

360Voice allows you to create a blog… for your XBox 360. Through the miracle of modern technology and possibly Jesus, any games, highscores, and progress you make while playing will automatically get blogged about by your 360 on it’s very own site. Don’t pretend to understand, just check out an example of the love right here.

If you didn’t buy your girlfriend a USB powered stripper dancing around a pole novelty item for Valentine’s Day, then I’m afraid you’re going to be without a girlfriend before this day is out. It’s just common sense people!

Morning traffic really is a chore. I was thinking of buying a Toyota Prius so that I can drive in the carpool lane, but perhaps the AARDVARK will be a little more effective for those busy early morning commutes…

Now you too can learn the secret of the Japanese magic. Ohhhhhh. Ahhhhhh.

This, ladies and gentlemen, is why you don’t go in to the ocean.

Up until now I’ve never really known the difference HDTV could make. This site uses The Lord of the Rings to show a frame by frame comparison of plain old DVD against HD. And the results are… Elventastic? Hobittrific? Bilbo Baggins!

The Bottom Line: for bigger, hairier hobbit feet - go HD.

I’ve already shown you that octopuses are masters of disguise, but did you know they are also master escape artists? Clearly no jail could ever hold them. Unless it had solid walls. Yeah, that’d do the trick.

Google Sightseeing takes you on a top-down tour of the world using Google Maps directly in your web browser. Each weekday your guides Alex and James introduce new weird and wonderful sights as suggested by the reader community. And if that sounds boring to you, then perhaps you’d be intrested to know you can also find naked people.

Midterm elections take place in the United States tomorrow, and I thought those of you who will be voting might be interested to know just how easy it is to compromise the fancy new electronic voting machine you are likely to be using. None of the four major suppliers of e-voting systems seem to have even a basic understanding of software security.

For those of you who haven’t carved a Jack-O-Lantern yet, there’s still time to create one that will leave you the envy of the neighborhood. Why just scare children when you can destroy their civilization and convert them to monotheism? By your command!

Neighboroo uses Google Maps to display all sorts of demographic information about neighborhoods in the US-of-A. Plug in your zip code and give it a whirl! It shows you things like crime rate, air quality, population density, racial breakdown, and a whole slew of other things that sound really boring but all of a sudden become fascinating when overlaid on a giant map in bright primary colors.

I have always been an ardent supporter of the increase in rapidly moving images in our daily lives. I won’t be happy until the logos on everybody’s shirts are spinning and changing colors, and the sidewalks are littered with epileptics. To that end, Philips has created Lumalive, light emitting diodes that can be woven in to fabric.

Those of you who got to experience an Apple II while growing up, no doubt have fond memories of the games available for it. Now you can relive those halcyon days thanks to this browser based Apple II emulator, and a massive collection of games. Unfortunately it only works in Internet Explorer, and it sucks using a mouse instead of a joystick, although if you have a one you can use it.

RuBot II, a robotic engineering marvel, can solve a Rubik’s Cube in less than 50 seconds. It can also haunt you in your worst nightmares, possibly transform into a gun, and perform lead roles in 70’s era episodes of Dr. Who.

This is a lot like Line Rider, but academic and unavailable to the general populace. If I had this though, I would spend days jumping rudimentary cars over things! Imagine if they had a teaching tool like this when you were in school.

Remember those mix-and-match animal cards from when you were a kid? You know, where you could put an elephant’s head on a giraffe’s body? This is just the same, but with people. Who can come up with the weirdest face?

UPDATE: Now with 3 different versions!

This application allows you to view Flickr photos that are predominantly made up of the color of your choosing. Perhaps not that interesting in and of itself, but almost every photo I’ve seen through this has been gorgeous.

The Carver is a motorcycle-car hybrid which can lean in to turns and, from the looks of this video, is a blast to drive. If you have money to burn and want to buy one, check out the Carver website.

In yet another shameless affront to Western Civilization, the Japanese have gone and genetically engineered crows that are smarter than us. Actually, not to split hairs but I should really change that to ’smarter than you’. No bird is smarter than this webmaster.