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Cool Cat Story
categories: Games

The premise of this game is completely wrong- there is no such thing as a “cool cat”. Cats are mankind-hating loveless creatures that are put on Earth to make people feel worthless just by looking at them. *TEAM DOG FTW*

categories: Games

Assuming that this name isn’t copyrighted, I will use it for my homemade meth.

BulletHell Adventure
categories: Games

Happy Monday, fruitcakes! How was your weekend? Did you steal some delicious chocolate eggs from your neighbor’s kids and now you’re checking how many of them fit in your mouth at once, or I’m the only one who spends Easter like that?

Cat Around The World: Alpine Lakes
categories: Games

This cat has already been to more places than I ever was. Granted, I suffer from an array of allergies that prevent me from traveling- I haven’t been tested yet, but I’m sure I’m allergic to fresh Alpine air and crystal clear lakes.

Wasteland Siege
categories: Games

Are you sieging the wasteland of my lonely heart? Because I welcome that my friends. I welcome it.

Cover Orange Journey Space
categories: Games

I will just assume this is the last one of these orange games. Where is there to go after the open space? It’s the most dangerous and the most desolate place there is. After Detroit, of course.

I Don’t Even Know
categories: Games

I’m having one of those days when you can’t find your keys, and one of your testicles has crawled back up into your body during the night. That’s why I had to repost this game.

The Mother of the Bird Men
categories: Games

Personally, I’d pay good money to watch the The Mother of the Bird Man and The Mother of Dragons mud wrestle on PPV. Until it actually happens, I’m gonna have to get imaginative with my extensive collection of hand puppets.

categories: Games

Angry Husky: Let me tell you about this one thing that’s never idle. My bowels. Let me tell you this one thing that’s idle if I order it to be idle. My bum sphincter. Consider this a warning.

Dungeons and Donuts 2
categories: Games

It’s fun living in times where games called “dungeons and donuts” not only exist, but demand a sequel.

Civilization Wars 4
categories: Games

A lot has changed since the first Civilization Wars game came out in 2010: my hair is longer, my pants are tighter, and I’m a proud owner of a Yugo car. Bought it from some guy named MiloŇ° who smelled like chicken bouillon and a Marmite that expired sometime in the early 90s.

There Is No Game
categories: Games, HTML5

Step aside folks, nothing to see here.

Skeleton Gardens
categories: Games

Skeletons in the garden are awesome. I bought my house super cheap because it’s built on an ancient Indian burial ground, and I couldn’t be happier. Sure every now and then my TV turns into a portal to the afterlife, but that’s totally bearable.

Royal Warfare 2
categories: Games

I have accomplished a lot this weekend, I have to say. My toenails have never been shorter, and my rubber band ball has never been bigger.