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Admit it, you’ve always wanted to punch a robot duck in a top hat. And as always, I provide. Yet for some reason I’ve never received a single gift basket in return…
*hint hint*
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I think I made it clear a long time ago that my final death wish is death by puppies.
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LOOKOUT! MONSTERS EVERYWHER!
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If my Ferrari had big googly eyes I wonder if it would stare lovingly at me as much as I stare lovingly at it?
Yeah that’s right, a Ferrari.
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Oh, I think I get it. So he wanted the kitty so he can feed it to the puppy, right?
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Let’s face it, this world is full of pain and suffering. That’s why I think it’s more merciful to put these doomed souls out of their misery with a few carefully placed shots to the face and groin, rather than doing as the game suggests and setting them free. Does that really make me a bad person?
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Fans of picross games will appreciate this one, as it takes the concept to a whole new level. And fans of rocket surgeons possessing Adonis-like male beauty will appreciate me, as I am a rocket surgeon with Adonis-like male beauty (minus the pants).
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Who do you call when the most precious diamond in the world has been stolen? A ninja with gigantism of the head, apparently. (And by the way badge freaks, there was also an achievement added to Grid16).
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My dad once told me that one day I’d find my own “cursed treasure”. He said it’s also called “a loveless marriage”. Then he started singing jazz standards to the dog and threw up in the ash tray (he only throws up when he drinks the cheap scotch).
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Years ago I discovered a simple mathematical formula that demonstrates a basic relationship between myself and insects:
(number of legs * size) + ground speed = pitch of my voice when I scream
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So what would you do if you could clone yourself? Most people would probably send their clone to work in their place, but that would just mean mine would be sitting here on the couch beside me all day. And I definitely don’t want that, because he smells like old salami and he keeps putting his hand on my leg.
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It’s not that easy being green, having to spend each day the color of the leaves (and geometric AI anomalies).
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Prepare yourself for adventure, intrigue, challenge, and reading. Lots of reading.
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