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Games

Dangerous Adventure 2
categories: Games

I’ve been through a dangerous adventure myself yesterday when I did my annual toenail clipping. First I had to bend down, then I had to find an appropriate tool for the task, then I had to drive myself to the ER due to the 3″ gash on my face caused by a flying toenail.

Infinite Hero
categories: Games, HTML5

Bad news: this game requires registration. Good news: you can just put in something like sirfartsalot@fartindustries.com. Weird news: that actually is my email. So yeah… email me, I’m pretty lonely.

Save The Bunny
categories: Games

Save the bunny, or, you know, just let him die on purpose about 74 times in a row because you’re a sadistic pig. Whatevz, your choice.

Fillz
categories: Games

Wazzaap, fruitcakes? Fa shizzle it’s tyme ta play some Fillz- what ‘chew thinkin’ man? Yo gots uh great weekend an’ don’ hurt yo’self!

Polar Opposites
categories: Games

I have a condition in my mouth called molar opposites. It’s hard to describe exactly what it is, but maybe it would help if I say it looks like a rabbit from Donnie Darko and Shane McGowan had a love child.

Hitting Stuff At A Building
categories: Games

This title pretty accurately describes my whereabouts throughout my teenage years.

I Broke The Time
categories: Games

Meh, just add it to the list with the other things I broke and charge it to the room after I check out of this hotel called life. *Friday moroseness*

Fury Of Metal
categories: Games

Reminds me of the time my mom wanted me to go to therapy, claiming that the death metal music had made me very angry. Little did she know that in reality what made me angry was having a tiny penis and giant bacne.

Acid Rain
categories: Games

Acid rain, acid rain.
Acid rain, acid rain.
I only wanted to see you bathing in the acid rain…

Rullo
categories: Games

That’s right boys and girls, it’s the last weekend of July which means it’s time for you to put your thinking caps on and prepare for the new academic year! What do you mean you’re 38, married with 2 kids and losing your hair rapidly? What happened to all the beautiful young boys that frequented DYOG… Wait, that sounds wrong.

Fugite De Morte
categories: Games

I have no idea what the title means, and I’m honestly not interested. My mom always told me the more languages I know, the more people in this world will be aware how stupid I am.

Slay One
categories: Games, HTML5

If you could slay only one person (past or present), who would it be? I would slay Christopher Columbus- apparently he was an enormous jerk blossom, and I don’t like that much competition.

Klocki
categories: Games, HTML5

This game is like an abusive girlfriend: at first she’s all cool and laid back, and makes you feel like you’re special and intelligent. But soon enough she insults you repeatedly, laughs in your face and says her ex’s both penis and wallet were thicker. *sobs*

One Shot Exterminator
categories: Games

I found a guy that advertised himself as “one shot exterminator” to get rid of the roaches from my apartment, but apparently the small print says the “one shot” is applicable only to insects that are not the size of an IKEA coffee table and speaking fluent English.