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FLASH GAME REVIEW: Fart Fart

Look – you guys are busy, I get that. You don’t have time to play every little Flash game I throw up here. But because my heart overflows with love for each and every one of you, I am launching a new segment: Flash Game Reviews! Now you can spend 10 minutes reading about a game that would otherwise take you 30 seconds to play. Please join Dizrali and I as we explore our very first specimen…

Voodoo Doll Vending Machines
categories: Articles, Funny

Let me introduce you to Whiskey McRabies – compact, cute, and with a mind full of unspeakable horrors.

Wills And Kate – The Freakiest Show On Earth
categories: Articles, Funny

Those of you that haven’t been living under a rock (or living on a large rock commonly referred to as “England”), will know that this Sunday Friday a real life prince is going to marry some girl and make her a princess. There may also be wizards in attendance and a clumsy dragon named Edmund. Live-on-the-scene reporter dizrali takes us there…

The Bagger 288

In 1978, deep in the bowels of a secret underground bunker in northern Germany, aging Nazi scientists completed a biological experiment first conceived of in the early years of WWII: genetically combining the DNA of a Jawa Sandcrawler, a circular saw, and Omega Supreme. The result was the Bagger 288.

How Rebecca Black Makes Capitalists Out Of Everyone

If you’ve been wondering what all this Rebecca Black nonsense of late is about, guest writer dizrali has some answers for you. He’s also got something that looks like an iguana head growing out of his left shoulder, but try not to stare.

Arachnophiles: Lovers Of The Unlovable

Having been known to peeiek at the sight of even the smallest house spider, I consider myself just about everything but an “arachnophile”. Today’s article (by guest writer dizrali), delves into the psyche of these outcasts of humanity.

peeiek (verb) – to simultaneously pee ones pants and shriek like an 8-year girl.

More Interspecies Animal Friends

Sure, if a dog sneaks into an orangutan sanctuary people use terms like “heart-warming” and “touching”, but when I break into the orangutan sanctuary all I hear is “not you again”, “where are your pants?”, and of course the familiar sound of a twelve gauge being cocked.

Cheeseburger in a Can – Revealed!

A little over one year ago, we broke the story on a bizarre feat of German engineering – Cheeseburger in a Can. After much debate over the actual appearance and palitability as described in the catalog, our loyal European reader Nika offered to hunt down the elusive hiker’s meal and answer all of our burning questions. These are her discoveries.

The Craziest Animal Friends

If there’s one thing people love, it’s money. Woah, that’s not what I meant to say. I meant porn. Ah! No, no, no… What I really meant was people love stories about animals making friends with other kinds of animals and lots of cute pictures of them hanging out together. And why? Honestly I’m not really sure. But here you go anyway.

Chrome Plated
categories: Articles, Pics

Parrots and grown men have always had one thing in common: a fascination for shiny things. At the other end of this link is an orgasmic collection of shiny metal mixed with ridiculous amounts of horsepower. If you’re a man, it is best viewed in the privacy of your home. If you’re a parrot, then send me an email, because you must be one clever parrot.

The Tortoise and the Hippo: Where Are They Now?

It’s been one year since Owen the baby hippo got swept away by the tsunami waves and washed straight into the arms(?) of Mzee the century-old tortoise. Let’s see how they’ve been doing. Sit back and get ready to be sucker-punched by the iron fist of cuteness.

Giant Tortoise Adopts Baby Hippo
categories: Articles, Cute, Pics

This story is kinda old, but I’m sure there’s a few people out there who haven’t seen it. And the pictures are enough to make grown men coddle their computer monitors and coo like babies, and that sort of power should not be kept under wraps.