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A Day At The Library
categories: Games

If I had spent a few more days at the library when I was a kid, I might have turned out to be a successful spaceship scientist, brain physician, or perhaps the mayor of a small village. Instead I talk to people on the internet and masturbate frequently. Let this be a lesson to you kids.

Motorcyclist Plays Burnout Chicken

One of the drivers should have called his bluff. What’s the worst that would have happened (to them)?

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Tiny King
categories: Games

I can relate to this. You can steal my money, my anti-depressants, my collection of matryoshka dolls- but don’t touch my cake. I will literally end you.

The Japanese have no respect for fire extinguishers.

Quick, somebody give this lady a job with the fire department!

Hook
categories: Games, HTML5

This game has really got me… hooked. GET IT? It’s a pun. Hooked, because I love hookers.

Zipline Couch Moving

For when you don’t want to carry a couch down three flights of stairs.

Sky Quest
categories: Games

Sky Quest: online Flash game or the search for a vacant airplane lavatory after the in-flight meal – you decide.

World’s Tallest Cow

If this was any animal other than a cow, I would be concerned.

The Rogue Puzzle Game
categories: Games

This game has gone more rogue than Sarah Palin during the 2008 elections.

Speeder Bike Quadrocopter Racing

All the fun, with none of the liquefied bodies.

Assembots
categories: Games

Well this is annoying, looks like I’m going to have to talk to a lawyer. I patented this idea back in 2003. Oh wait, nevermind. I thought that said AssBots.

Chinese TV Censoship

There are so many countries to avoid.

Kingdom Of Liars: Stonepath
categories: Games

The Kingdom of Liars game was created as social commentary on the current political system in America. I know this because the developer and I are friends and he told me during a polo match in the Hamptons last week. We were celebrating my 23rd birthday. I also own a rocket ship and a full grown tiger named Atticus Roarski.

South African Train

South Africa has got more work to do if they want to meet India’s level of train insanity, but they’re on the way.